


"Руководство для кошек"

by 3amepiphany



Series: YOI Fic-A-Thon 2018 [6]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Gen, i can haz russian cat memes?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-10
Updated: 2018-12-10
Packaged: 2019-09-15 11:56:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16932831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/3amepiphany/pseuds/3amepiphany
Summary: House-sitting. Cat-sitting. House-cat-sitting.





	"Руководство для кошек"

**Author's Note:**

> A prelude to a request from @samygeefox. Well. Truthfully this was sort of an accident. My brain decided to put Otabek here instead of the person she was asking for. So now I suppose I'll just have to call this a bonus. Aw, gee. I hecked it up. You benefit. Yer welcome.

Otabek swiped down the screen to make sure that his post had loaded, and then looked around to see if Potya had decided that he wasn’t a threat but a visitor she had met before, and a source of companionship and food for the next week or so.

She hadn’t.

He started to wonder if Yuri had changed his mind last-minute and packed the cat up with him to go to Japan, but then he looked down at the instructions that had been left on the counter for him next to the stack of canned food and ultimately decided that the cat had to be around here somewhere. It would just be a little time, surely. With Yakov and Yuri gone to Kiev for the champions’ camp last night and Lilia just having left for Paris in a whirlwind just hours after picking Otabek up from the airport and giving him a tour of her home this morning, the cat was likely as stressed out as he was. And watching him from somewhere.

The instructions Lilia had left him were nowhere near the length of this sheet; and he studied it as he sat down and settled in for a quiet afternoon of decompressing and maybe a short nap.

“Puma-Tiger-Scorpion might remember who you are from your last visit, or she may not, I’m unsure. In any case once you’ve given her treats she will decide on if she should or not, and that’s her business.

“She gets half of a can of the wet food every morning, and she will let you know when she is ready for it. If you are awake before she is ready, that is okay, she will come out to meet you and maybe steal some of your coffee if you put cream in it. If you are asleep when she is ready, it is good morning immediately or else. So fair warning.

“When you feed her, please ensure that you are smearing the food all over her plate as thin as you can make it. Otherwise you will be stepping in it later because she ate too fast and it upset her stomach. Be ready to please leave her a bit of whipped cream on the plate you serve her wet food on when she has eaten it all. That is something Lilia started with her and I can’t break the habit but it’s fine in a way because she seems a lot happier for it. After she eats she likes to lay down and cuddle, and this is the perfect time to give her a brushing down.

“She’ll need to be brushed daily because of her long hair but she loves it very much. Please be sure to use the slicker brush first, and then the bristle brush. One will pull away any loose fur and untangle spots that need it, the other will keep her soft and pretty. When you brush her, she will want to rub her face all over the brush and even try to eat it, but be careful, as the slicker brush is prickly and can hurt her. It will be best to do that with the bristle brush. She should stay mostly still for you after a little of this though. When you brush her go with the fur only from the top of her head all the way down her back in short little strokes, and you MUST say ‘brush-brush-brush’ as you go. She likes that best and will let you know when it is time to brush her belly. She is not ticklish there, but will try to catch your hand or the brush as if to play.

“When you play with her she will want to play more with the feathers on the stick, and she will probably decide when it is time to play because she will find this stick and bring it to you. Don’t try to play with anything else when she does this.

“There may be a nap time for her before her dinner; let her sleep or she will be up all night reminding you why you should have let her sleep.

“She may try to get you to share your meals with her. Don’t. She will make the most persuasive faces at you. Resist.

“Her dinner is a half-cup of crunchies. We just opened a new bag for her so she will probably eat up every last bit as fast as she can and then have an upset stomach. That is why there is a tennis ball in her crunchies bowl. Leave it there if you do not want wet mushy socks. After dinner she will not want cuddles. She will sit on the far side of the room opposite of wherever you are until she has figured out what you are doing. Then she will want to do that too. Lilia will read a magazine in the evening and Potya will try to join her, but this usually ends up with Lilia trying to read through a magazine as quickly as she can before she has a cat laying on it. She will do the same thing with your laptop if you have your laptop out, and you will have both a cat and the laptop on you.

“Potya will try to brush her teeth with you in the night before bed. I think she just likes the taste of toothpaste but I usually just let her smell it if I can be quick enough before she licks it because I don’t think toothpaste is good for cats. Then she will want her bedtime treats if you are going to bed after this. She gets five. And she will count out five as you give them to her. On the fifth one she will hop back a step, and then jump away and run as if you are to chase her. You can chase her if you want, she will probably find it fun.

“You can give her a few treats through the day or when you arrive, and she will come running when she hears you shake the bag. She also likes catnip but you must make sure it is crushed up small enough for her to eat. She will lick it right out of your hand and really likes to roll around in what she doesn’t eat so you can sprinkle what’s left in your hand on the bed and she will be thankful and will want to cuddle after some rolling around. 

“Her litter box is in my bathroom. There is a bin next to her litter box with a scoop. Lilia would like the box cleaned at least twice a day which is reasonable for everyone involved. I can guarantee you will want to keep up with that. Potya tries her best not to make a mess but there is a mat there for her, yet there will will probably be some litter on the floor anyways. I keep a broom behind the door. You probably noticed her water dish is a fountain. You will probably find her in the sink or in the bathtub waiting for you to turn these on so she may drink from them like a hedonist. Don’t let her. She will sing to you like a dying siren when she wants you to turn one of these on. Don’t listen to her. Otherwise you will have to deal with a wet cat crawling all over you for sympathy later because she has gotten wet and is annoyed by it.

“There are emergency contacts on the fridge if she is in need or if something happens but please be sure to text me to let me know how she is doing regardless. A photo every now and then would be nice because as you read this I am probably missing her a lot. You do not have to be in them if you do not want to be. But that would be nice too.

“Thank you for watching Potya, and for house-sitting for Lilia. Yakov and I will find something special to bring back to you as a gift in return.”

It was about four pages, hand-written, and there was a messy little Potya drawn next to Yuri’s signature at the end.

Then, “PS - Remember that she is supposed to go limp when you pick her up!!! Ragdolls do that. Don’t panic.”

From his sparse number of curated followers on Instagram he had a couple of comments on the photo of this sheaf of paper that he had captioned in Cyrillic as: “Cat Manual”.

One was Christophe, saying, “On par with owning a cat.” Another was Leo - “I expect only the best Russian cat memes from you while you are there.”

He got a text from Yuri. “Enough detail?”

“Hopefully.”

As he put his phone down on the nearby side table, he noticed that Potya had appeared on the other side of the loveseat, staring at him with her wide, round eyes. He stared back, watching her whiskers twitch slightly. This went on for several quiet minutes before she approached him. She sat in front of him and sniffed at his shoes and then at his jeans, and waited for him to put a hand down for her so she could sniff at that too. After recognizing who he was, she rubbed her face on his hand while making soft ‘mrrp’ sounds before jumping into his lap. There, she flopped down and rolled her head up at him, blinking slowly at him a bit and lolling all of her paws and her tail about languidly.

This week ought to be as laid-back as this cat, he thought.

He snapped a photo of this and posted it to Instagram as well; captioning it “Cat for Cat Manual”.

Yuri liked it seconds later.


End file.
